:: emotionally lazy ::
hmm...
Have you ever wonder why the love has suddenly faded away? Or, your partner suddenly being cold? I bet some of you guys have a wild guess of them fallen out of love. It might be right but there's another possibility, which can be called as emotionally lazy. Yes, your boyfriend or your girlfriend might inherit this mood somewhere. Haha..
Well, for certain people who has a trouble in expressing their feelings (which is mostly guys), it's not that simple. They may become less demonstrative and less loving compared to the other. It can be upsetting the other one because they might assume that we are fallen out of love. And please, don't freak out. Most of the times, it indicates that he now feels safe within a relationship or some people call as comfortable. For instance, he assumes you know that he loves you.
I bet some of you might get fed up with your partner if they never tell their feelings. Though they might seem as cold as Snow Queen, their behavior is not entirely their own fault. Showing love...for me, action speaks louder than words but other person might have different opinion. Somehow, some of us feel that it doesn't come easily. Certain people find saying all those stuff as embarassing. And if you put it to blame, or the more you express your dissatisfaction the less they feel loved by you or they may be pressured by it. I know some people are not prepared to stay in a relationship where they have to keep asking to be loved. But consider this, there're also some people out there who can't stand if they keep asking by their partner why this why that, why suddenly changed and why not the same.
Humans have different characteristics. Some are expressive and verbalise every feeling and thought. Some are quiet and inarticulate perhaps. So there are a lot of interpretation of having a relationship. Certain people think they can be intimate just by sitting together reading newspaper or watching TV in silence (I call this as mutual understanding). It's like "we've been together long enough, so you should know how important you are to me". Is this kind of people have a huge ego problem? Maybe, maybe not. Whatever it is, there will always be the opposite side of perspective.
These peeps that I potray as less demonstrative person, probably not a great relationship material. If you feel they don't deserve your love, then why wasting time? If you're certain that your partner eventhough in Malay says as sengal, but loves you then the problem could be that they're shy or unschooled in expressing their emotions. Though they may not be great in showing or expressing their feelings like you, they may nurture you in other ways like bringing a cup of coffee or say "I care for you".
After all we have the right to know that we're loved by our partner. That's one of the reasons we enter into committed relationship. But if we're with a person who has trouble giving us a hushy-mushy thingy, it it important for us to be a little more open-minded about what constitutes an expression of love.
Have you ever wonder why the love has suddenly faded away? Or, your partner suddenly being cold? I bet some of you guys have a wild guess of them fallen out of love. It might be right but there's another possibility, which can be called as emotionally lazy. Yes, your boyfriend or your girlfriend might inherit this mood somewhere. Haha..
Well, for certain people who has a trouble in expressing their feelings (which is mostly guys), it's not that simple. They may become less demonstrative and less loving compared to the other. It can be upsetting the other one because they might assume that we are fallen out of love. And please, don't freak out. Most of the times, it indicates that he now feels safe within a relationship or some people call as comfortable. For instance, he assumes you know that he loves you.
I bet some of you might get fed up with your partner if they never tell their feelings. Though they might seem as cold as Snow Queen, their behavior is not entirely their own fault. Showing love...for me, action speaks louder than words but other person might have different opinion. Somehow, some of us feel that it doesn't come easily. Certain people find saying all those stuff as embarassing. And if you put it to blame, or the more you express your dissatisfaction the less they feel loved by you or they may be pressured by it. I know some people are not prepared to stay in a relationship where they have to keep asking to be loved. But consider this, there're also some people out there who can't stand if they keep asking by their partner why this why that, why suddenly changed and why not the same.
Humans have different characteristics. Some are expressive and verbalise every feeling and thought. Some are quiet and inarticulate perhaps. So there are a lot of interpretation of having a relationship. Certain people think they can be intimate just by sitting together reading newspaper or watching TV in silence (I call this as mutual understanding). It's like "we've been together long enough, so you should know how important you are to me". Is this kind of people have a huge ego problem? Maybe, maybe not. Whatever it is, there will always be the opposite side of perspective.
These peeps that I potray as less demonstrative person, probably not a great relationship material. If you feel they don't deserve your love, then why wasting time? If you're certain that your partner eventhough in Malay says as sengal, but loves you then the problem could be that they're shy or unschooled in expressing their emotions. Though they may not be great in showing or expressing their feelings like you, they may nurture you in other ways like bringing a cup of coffee or say "I care for you".
After all we have the right to know that we're loved by our partner. That's one of the reasons we enter into committed relationship. But if we're with a person who has trouble giving us a hushy-mushy thingy, it it important for us to be a little more open-minded about what constitutes an expression of love.
This entry was posted
on Thursday, August 18, 2005 at 3:36 PM.
